Ask Dr. Harley Quinn: How Can I Learn to Accept Change?

Harleen Quinzel

Harleen Quinzel

May 15, 2020


Hey there, puddins! Ever wonder how ta get that crush a’yers ta notice ya? Or how ta get yer folks off yer back? Or how ta make the best breakfast sammich ever?! Harley Quinn here to give you all the AMAZIN’ advice y’been searchin’ for all yer dumbass lives – with the help of my good pals (and the writers of my bestselling comic book) Amanda Conner and Jimmy Palmiotti! So go ahead an’ spill all a’ yer troubles in my ongoing Community thread, and maybe I’ll answer YOUR question next in this weekly column. Now let’s see what folks are askin’ this week…


Editor's Note: Alas, our time with Harley is soon coming to an end. Next week's column (arriving on Thursday, May 21st) will be her last for the time being. So please be sure to submit any questions you have now. Thanks! 




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Uggh, I can relate. My first instinct is to go out and run as fast as I can away from everything, but being on lockdown, it is limited for sure. I am reading a lot of states are opening things up, so maybe you can get some park time in soon. Until then, it’s all about keeping your brain busy with things and understanding that this might be the new normal for a while.


Depression has a lot of sources, so maybe slow things down and try to take a hard look at what exactly is depressing you. You know, can it be from not talking to friends and family, is it the crappy menu, is it not being heard by those around you …and so on. So, if you cannot get outdoors, open up those windows and get fresh air, give yourself a routine you stick to daily with exercise and eating well as part of your daily activity. Maintain your social life online, on the phone and however you can. Remember, a lot of people are going through the same thing. I like to draw, as you may know, so making art is part of my routine. All these things help and if you feel the weight of depression is still hanging over you, reach out and find some professional help. Remember, asking for help is a sign of strength and not weakness.






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Not only is it OKAY, it’s the coolest thing in the world that you collect so many things focusing around me. I think it is great to have a hobby and when I am someone’s hoppy it shows a certain air of distinction.  You admiring me makes me feel all warm and fuzzy, and I hope one day to check out that collection of yours! Keep it up!






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Thank you for those sweet compliments. It seems the source of the tension between you and your parents might just be a simple communication problem. Did you let them know how stressed you really are? Did you let them know their misplaced anger is only making the situation more difficult for you and creating a wall between you guys?


Well, I know communicating this stuff is difficult when others don’t have the proper responsiveness for what is going on with someone else, so the situation and feelings you all are having need to be addressed. Maybe what is best is to write them a letter…something they can read in a quiet moment and maybe, if written well, they can see what the problem is. I also want to point out that empathy works both ways and maybe your parents are stressed as well, worrying about jobs, money and even you, so you all need to cut each other some slack and come at this from a place of love and understanding. If that doesn’t work, but a lottery ticket, win the lottery, Collect your millions and move out.


I world try the letter first though.






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Many a father have asked me this same question over and over and it’s really a simple one. Give them space, have empathy to their feelings, and be open to listening to her and not judging. This is not a problem you can fix like a broken chair leg…the secret here is to let her have room to breathe and listen to whatever she is willing to share with you had give her your support. Stop with the fixing and open those ears.






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You obviously think her religious beliefs are holding her back from being what you think is considered normal.


Let that sink in. Slow it down and read into your question you are asking.


I don’t think she’d like how you are viewing her, how you are judging her, and your conclusion of her beliefs. I would suggest you not ask her out till you take a deep dive into the things you are assuming about her. My advice is spending more time communicating with her, getting to know her and seeing exactly what makes her tick before asking her out. Get to know her before slamming a bunch of assumptions on her and having a conclusion that might not be based on facts. In the end, this will make you a better person, trust me.






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Change is constant. Nothing stays the same. People grow. The world changes minute by minute. The thing about change is it can be frightening, but it can also be exciting and make a person try new things. Depends on the angle of approach. In the end, with something like online classes, you can adapt for sure, but you have to WANT to adapt and it’s up to you whether you take your studies seriously or not, so nothing really changes in that department. Decisions start with you. Approach things with positive energy and the outcome will always be a better one.





Note: The opinions expressed by Harley Quinn are published for entertainment purposes only, and are not intended as a substitute for professional advice. Please consult a qualified professional for your specific needs or concerns.